Supporting Youth Through Trauma: What Caregivers and Families Need to Know
* The recommendations below have been written in collaboration with a Foundry Virtual BC Family Peer Support Worker.
When young people experience trauma, whether directly or through the constant stream of violent news and social media, it can shake their sense of self and safety in ways that are not always obvious. As adults, we often want to help but don’t always know what to do or where to start. The reality is, supporting your young person through difficult moments in life doesn’t always require perfection. It requires presence, awareness, and compassion – for your young person and yourself!
Below are some practical tips and tools to help you as a caregiver better understand signs to look out for, or how to navigate tough conversations and moments with young people in your life.
1) Recognizing the Signs: When Youth Are Struggling
Trauma does not always appear obvious or apparent. For many young people, signs can show up as subtle shifts long before they are able to articulate what they might be feeling. Some common signs that someone may be starting to struggle include:
- Changes in behavior or daily routines
- Changes in eating behaviors
- Changes in sleeping patterns
- Withdrawing from friends or family
- Heightened sensitivity to any form of violence
- Emotional numbness (or, intense reactivity)
- New usage of or increased substance use
- Thoughts of suicide or expressions of survivor’s guilt
These signs do not necessarily mean a young person is in crisis, but they do signal that they may need some extra support, understanding, and space to process. You can also check out “Trauma & PTSD” on the Kelty Mental Health website for more information.
2) Navigating Media and Misinformation
In moments of crisis, media outlets move fast (and not always accurately). Young people are often exposed to excess information through social media – much of it is unverified. This can amplify the fear, confusion, and distress that young people may be feeling.
Encourage young people to:
- Limit exposure to graphic or repetitive content
- Ask questions with curiosity about what they may be seeing
- Check information with trusted adults
Sometimes young people just need permission to take a step back and unplug. Giving them permission to turn away is powerful. It reminds them that they are allowed to protect their mental and emotional wellbeing.
Communication: A Big Piece of the Healing Puzzle
During times of crisis and trauma, there is no such thing as reacting the ‘right’ way. If you are watching your young person behaving differently than their usual self, it is normal to have concerns. Open and honest communication is one of the most effective tools we can have as caregivers. Although times like these often make caregivers feel like we need to know how to fix the pain of our young people, you don’t need to have the perfect words. What they need is for us to show up authentically.
A few suggestions to get you started:
- Share your own feelings and reactions. It can help model emotional honesty
- Validate their emotions, even if they differ from yours
- Normalize their responses: fear, confusion, anger, numbness…all of it is human
- If they don’t want to talk, offer alternatives like a feelings handout or journal prompts. You can find templates for this through a simple google search.
Keep It Casual: The Power of Simple Moments
Not every conversation needs to happen face-to-face at the kitchen table. In fact, many young people open up more easily when the pressure is off and they have a slight distraction.
Try connecting through the following activities:
- Going for a drive together
- A walk or hike
- A trip to their favorite spot
- Grabbing groceries together
- Doing a craft or cultural activity together
- Making a meal together
If you have multiple children, consider spending 1:1 time with each of them. Some young people will not speak freely in front of their siblings, especially if they are trying to appear strong or unaffected.
Remember! Caregiving for people we love can be challenging. The most important thing to keep in mind is how you take care of yourself while trying to show up for your young person. Foundry is here to support you (and your youth!) Connect with a Counsellor or Family Peer Supporter at one of our local centres or virtually, by downloading the Foundry BC app. All services are free, confidential, and do not require a referral.
** Note: For young people who experience neurodivergence, traumatic events may bring about unique emotions or challenging feelings. It is important to encourage these young people to connect with trusted support individuals who can help them through whatever they might be feeling. In the future, an article specific to supporting the neurodiverse community experiencing trauma will be shared!